Eschewing the conventional wisdom of issuing road users with a booklet describing good practice for drivers and pedestrians, the Chinese authorities prefer the medium of roadside murals to convey the more salient points of the subject. This has the additional benefit of providing employment for semi-skilled artists rendered unemployed by advances in creative computer software. I have provided a convenient translation of the images for those unfamiliar with Chinese, cultural, automotive norms.
1. Headbutting is a particularly ineffective means of alerting other road users of your presence.
2. When shopping with your child be sure to buy sufficient quantities of over processed, sugary products to inhibit the inevitable tantrums brought on by withdrawal symptoms in the precocious little brat, which may distract you when crossing the road.
3. The roadside is an unsuitable location to practice the 200m hurdles.
4. Mysterious dark figures and menacing robot cars dissuade foolish pedestrians from imagining that such road markings give them any priority over vehicles.
5. Do not let cyclopes lead you across busy roads as they are well known for their inability to judge the distance and speed of oncoming traffic.
6. Blocking a lane of the highway to take pictures of the scenery is only permitted in the case of the arrival of an ambulance at a fatal accident thus facilitating morbidly obsessive photography of victims.
7. Having a huge inflatable, smiley, character filling up your car is an unnecessary distraction from the imminent head on collision with an equally distracted man, who is attempting to combine a mobile phone conversation and an argument with his hysterical wife.
